When I think of fall, but especially October, I think of quiet, or the only sound around being the crunch of leaves. I enjoy being busy, having a toddler, and drinking coffee to keep me awake during the day as much as the next person. However there is something magical about having a few moments, sometimes even a couple of hours of silence. I don’t mean actual time without noise. Currently I am listening to a sweet Simon and Garfunkle live in Central Park record which is really the best. What I mean is time where no one is demanding my attention. Time in which I have put aside my to do list, where no one is talking to me and expecting me to listen. Few times during the month do all the stars align that my house is empty, Carl is with his dad or a grandparent, Faith is at work or something, dawn or dusk is coming swiftly and all is quiet. I think the few moments I am able to spend like this are exactly why I am able to be a semi functioning human most of the time.
If I could give one gift to women, but all moms especially it would be to find some moments like this in whatever haven you gather the most peace from. There is a great deal to be said and currently is being said about the mental load that falls on mostly women. Things like when is the bill due, are the kids going to need lunch/fundraiser/activity money, who is picking each kid up at a different time when school lets out and then taking each kid to a separate activity, and so on and so forth. Each month I write up a calendar of all the visitation dates Carl has with his dad, all the activities we plan to participate in from Library classes to zoo trips to church things. I try to include everything I can think of. I then send that along with any other pertinent information to his dad. I take that information and put it on the family calendar along with all my work dates, Faith’s work dates and any family events, trips or other things we have planned. I take all that and put it in my personal planner along with any activities I have planned then I put notes in about how much this or that is going to cost. I do this every month and I have been since Carl started have visitation days with his dad I guess at about 6 months.
And when I get some quiet moments I take advantage of them. I find that peace. I sit on my front porch or I sit at my desk or I got to Target or I do whatever I want that doesn’t require me to speak to another human and it keeps me healthy. We should all try and find ways to take care of ourselves…and if that doesn’t work I hear antidepressants can work wonders. But most of all the calming power of a changing season, cooling temperatures, and that hint of the holidays in the air can inspire joy and peace in us if we just let it.